Lost maps, hitchhiking, abandoned temples and apologetic bees

So we made a spur of the moment trip into the wilderness the other day! Yaaaay, the wilderness! I bloody love the wilderness. 

Yes, indeed, very spur of the moment. The night before, as our flatmate Toby was galavanting out the door to fly to Tibet we were bugging him for information about a perky hike and crudely drawing maps on post-it notes. Then we were off to the supermarket at 11pm in search of supplies for our trek . . . into the wilderness! Yay! Going to bed at 1pm wasn't the wisest of choices given our 5am wake up call the next day but hey ho, never mind!

The destination: Mt Takago down in yonder Chiba to the south-east of the Big Toke

Now, this place is well out of the way when it comes to access and that goes doubly when your Japanese skills are tantamount to that of an overtly lazy panda with a learning disorder. We needed to catch a train and then a train and then an elusive bus that came once in a blue moon. However, our good friend Keiko did some research and it turned out said bus had been discontinued and thus our route was changed at the very last minute.

Lost maps and hitchhiking

And so, to slash a tedious story perky, we found ourself in Matsuoka - which incidentally could easily be labelled "The-ass-end-of-where." Luckily the folk in The-ass-end-of-where are extremely friendly and even took the time to draw us a map which would guide us the 11 or so kilometers we needed to walk to find the hike - and yes, I did say 11 bloody kilometers. We walked though and as we did, the rain joined us and somehow our map of where the hike was and how to find it fell out of my safe-like pocket. Luckily it was at the exact moment our efforts at hitchhiking came to fruition and a lovely couple from . . . Japan, gave us a lift to the beginning of the park. Top notch adventure so far. Now bring on the formality of the tramp!

Abandoned temples

We made it! To the tramp. Seriously, by this stage we felt we had triumphed in the most important part of our journey and that was finding the route in the middle of nowhere in a place called Toyofusa. We cracked on after a quick coffee - would you believe they even have vending machines that sell heated coffee in the middle of nowhere? Yes, yes you would - it's bloody Japan innit. The forest was beautiful and it proved to be a really great testing ground for the stability of my leg which had been operated on about six months earlier. The muddy, up and down terrain tested it's ability to hold firm and it passed with flying colours. The sound of the forest was beautiful and a welcome change from the bustle of busy Shibuya. We only hiked 3km, but it was a tricky 3km given the terrain and the rain - and anyway, the real pay off wasn't doing a long hike it was staying in an abandoned temple we had heard legend of. We found it.

We approached a large rock, like an outcrop, among the forest and trees and realised a sizable hole had been hewn through it with a steep stair descending onto a small green carpet of grass. Beyond was the Mt Takago Kannon sculpted into the cliff face. It over looked a magnificent valley with hills and mountains bubbling off into the distance. Wonderfully, almost the moment we got there the light rain cleared out and the sun broke through to illuminate the valley stretching off into the distance. It was divine. Amazingly there was a tiny dribble of water of the cliff face that made a very small pool for washing hands etc. Imagine my surprise when I spotted two fresh water crabs in there. The temple itself is a dedication to Kannon, the goddess of mercy. Inside a somewhat restored, yet abandoned temple was a couple of log chairs, a demonesque face carving, a picture from what we deduced to be the late 70s, a whole bunch of scribbling on the walls from hikers now as immortal as the statue of Kannon herself which stood at the back of the temple looking out the door at the magnificence of nature. It was really special. The kind of place you read about . . .  on blogs . . .

Apologetic bees

We sat and enjoyed our lunch on the step of the temple and as I did I realised the bees in Japan are very . . . apologetic. Usually, my experience of bees when it comes to picnics, is they pester and piss you off buzzing around looking for sweet things. These Japanese bees seemed to come along, see you, then say "Oops, sorry, didn't see you there, I'll move along." Very bizarre and then as we descended from the temple to the waterfall down the track and I mean down (like devil's staircase down) I noticed most of the wildlife in Japan doesn't pester or annoy. Which is bloody good when you need to stay the night in an abandoned temple with no doors to speak of. 

Dinner and dusk

We forgot the bloody sausages didn't we. But we made do with our delicious tinfoiledkumara, carrots and mushrooms. With a side of bread and some fire boiled mint tea we had a feast over a game of chess - how civilized. We fell asleep to the sound of the rain on the roof. Amazingly, weren't hounded my mosquitos or any other insect-like foes and we slept trough the night peacefully - another fine example of the conscientious nature of Japanese wildlife. 

Return to the Tokester

Alas, it must all come to an end and after a brekky of rice, tinned coffee heated over a fire and bananas we were off through the rain back to civilization - and stopped short, with a scratch of the head and a mental prolapse due to the incomprehensible bus stop. We ended up hitchhiking with the first person that drove past our eager thumb. They were a lovely couple on their way back from the hospital. She had hurt her leg dancing with children. More interestingly, the bloke spent a year in NZ 20 years earlier and thus we had loads to talk about. His chuckle and mentioning of "windy Wellington" and his love of Hokey Pokey ice cream let us know that he fully understood NZ as a culture and a country. Six hours later I was back at work with the trip to Mt Takago and glowing memory.

Ways in which Japan changes you - Part One

We'll save you the tedious platitudes for not blogging about our antics recently and simply say: We've been busy having an awesome time. Booya!

So we've been here over a year now and it's quite interesting to reflect on ways in which Tokyo can change a person. Here are a few of these reflections.

I can't eat this! Where's my bloody oshiburi? 

So with pretty much all meals here you get a moist towelette, kind of like you do on the plane.  They're called oshiburi. When you first get here you read warnings in guidebooks etc not to wipe your face with them and that they're only for your hands prior to eating and so on and so forth. But in all honesty, they're just a bloody hand towel--do what you want with em. Turn em into a floppy paper-plane if you want.

And so you use these things all the time, almost every meal, whether it's a dirty little salad from the combini or a lovely, all you can eat okonmiyaki joint, there are loads of em.

And then, one day, they don't come, there are none on the table and you find yourself aghast saying:

"Where . . . where is my oshiburi? I - I can't eat this!" and in your mind your hands and fingers are teeming with bacteria and horror, all manner of beasties waiting, lurking, at the ready to give you X. 

As a fallout you slowly gather unused oshiburi (they're usually wrapped in plastic) and keep one in your briefcase, backback, purse, just in case. Note the word cleanliness - a central principle to Japanese life.

Today in Tokyo, 1,000,000 brollies lost their lives because of a bit of wind

Coming from Windy Wellington you can imagine my opinion on umbrellas: Bloody useless. In fact, forever etched in most of our Wellingtonian minds are images of splintered umbrellas stuffed disdainfully into bins. But the truth is, in Welly, we all just wear jackets if it's rainy and I think it creates a hardiness in us, right? We weather the weather.

The sheer volume of brollies in Tokyo, is unfathomable and they are just so expendable. I think it's because most Japanese seem to harbour a rabid fear of the rain. Many a time you can see people in the slightest of drizzle charging through the rain as if satan himself was in pursuit. And so when the occasional (very occasional) windy day does come or - heaven forbid it - a typhoon, 13,000,000 people need to use an umbrella. But the funny thing is, these nutters will also try valiantly to use a 100 yen (NZD 1.50) umbrella in a tree cracking gale and in the wake of any storm you will find the horror, the massacre of multitudes of brollies thrown into the street, naked, shameful in - literally - piles the height of very tall dwarfs.

But anyway, dramatic holocaustic imagery aside, you get involved with the brolly culture here and the weather report becomes your best mate as you too now endeavour to avoid any possibility of finding yourself running through the satanic rain. In the end we adapt to fit in with our environment.

"Walk ya ####s!"

There are so many people is probably the most tedious observation you can make about Tokyo. But it's true and man, it changes you.

Walking here is slow, real slow, they all just dawdle along, which is pretty logical really as there are loads of people - but dear me it can push your patience. Even when I was on my crutches I was overtaking people. And it's not so much an impatience thing, it is that some people walk INCREDIBLY slowly - too slowly - and are also, at times, extremely inconsiderate with it; you know, a group of six standing and lolly gagging in 10,000 peoples way on a tiny walkway, that kind of thing. So you end up really having to manage your serenity and patience because if you don't... well if you don't this kind of thing happens. 

Just a few weeks ago I was walking up a major road in Shinjuku with an Aussie. I was happy plodding along to tell you the truth, we were yarning and I had nowhere to be. But then out of the blue the Aussie hollers "WALK YA C###S!"at the group of four people dawdling in front of us. They obviously didn't really understand and thus it didn't help our situation, but I found it interesting as it highlights this propensity to exist within your own bubble here, saying things or muttering things out loud, because nobody understands you anyway. If you don't manage your serenity you can become a bit of a mutterer or dare I say it - a nutter.

A well-spent day brings happy sleep - Leo da Vinci

If that's the case, Leo, how do you explain all the sleeping going on in the Japanese rail system?

Many of you will know of my brief interest in train sleeping, but what is interesting is that we fall into the same behaviour. I would never have dreamed of sleeping on a train in Welly, just wouldn't really. Life didn't, well, life didn't need it.

Here, it does. Escape? Maybe. Rest? Maybe. Who knows why, but sleeping on the train here is the norm and more than once now I have found myself quietly dipping into meditation and then bam, I'm sleeping. Not long and deep enough to miss stops or anything - just escaping briefly, an abiltiy to ignore that fat smelly salary man's ass nudging ever closer to my face.

The food.....

So I've got me a pretty sweet routine here - my beloved wife brings me a few snacks when she comes to visit but beyond that I receive three square meals a day, chopsticks n all.

8am, 12am and 6pm on the dot, and always with a half an hour foreshadow cup of weak cha and oshibori (disposable wet hand towel.)

I was apprehensive regarding the food as many a witness had testified to the horror concoctions that are served up three times daily in a Byoin (hospital). But I've been pleasantly surprised, yes on the occasional day you get a mushy type soupy vapidity that looks about as appetizing as salted brick; but if mix it in with the immortal bowl of rice and the omnipresent pickled veges -  you have a meal... transformed. *insert magical music*

But the meals in truth have been pretty good, it peaked a night or so ago (the nights and days here become one) when they served tempura with a nice soya sauce. MECHA OISHI DESU! They have also served up crumbed fish; some over sized lettuce parcels loaded with chicken and the other day a bit of spag bol. I'd say it reminded me of home - but that's bollocks; my mum is from Yorkshire and I don't see these Japanese chefs knocking out any Yorkshire puddings anytime soon.

Oooop, my breakfast has just been served now; let's have a looky look.

Large white bowl with rice  (with small packet of rice sprinkle flavouring) - Check.

Miso with rounded white bread croutons - Check.

Smaller side dish of spinachy stuff mixed with shredded chicken - Check.

Second side dish with fried/boiled tofu and a few token carrots - Check.

Okay so each dish on its own warrants nothing to wet the bed about - but mix it all in with the rice and you've got yourself a banger brekky/ranchii/ban-gohan. Bam!

Stay classy internet..

Lunch? Breakfast? Couldn't say sorry.

Hospital Drama!

Ahoy there!

That aint cran

I've found a sliver of WIFI here at the hospital, which is nice. It is kind of off and on again but it's good to have some semblance of contact with the outside world.

Anyway – for those that don’t know I have had ACL knee reconstruction in a Japanese hospital – Edogawa Byoin to be precise. The operation went really well and from what I can understand from the doctors, nurses and orderlies my progress has been extremely rapid. Four days out and I’m flexing at 90 degrees.

Here's a small outline of what happened – beware – contents can be graphic

Sunday

I went in Sunday night with a cloud in my heart, as I would be missing the Rugby World Cup Final. I had been told that there is no WIFI here and wouldn’t be allowed if it was. Despite this I tried many way to source a way to watch it - I had even tried to coerce the nurses etc into letting me escape from 5pm to find an internet cafe/sports pub. But I needed to be back by 4pm so that plan was out of the b@stard question. So about 4.30 I thought I'd read a book on my laptop and discovered I had a tiny sliver of WIFI. Which is a miracle - it must be from a local business or something. But anyway I managed to get a tiny connection with a sports website and watched the rugby and the trophy presentation live. No food from 9pm Sunday night.

Monday (surgery day)

Woke early - sleep was not too bad and Hannah visited with snacks and loving prior to the surgery. In the OR I had my little gown thing stripped from me down to my undies while the spinal epidural was administered and I was out not long after the general anesthetic. Awoke three hours later with Hannah and nurses making a fuss and I was trying hard to speak Japanese. It all is very hazy around this point as I was in and out of consciousness and unable to sit up let alone move at all to check my position. From what I could tell I had a tube in my back to my spine, a big one from my knee, one to my vein (IV drip) and one in my wang (how pleasant). I also had two things rhythmically blowing up around my feet to help my circulation. Bollocks knows where my undies were. So yeah a fairly hazy - yet pain free day slowly becoming cognizant with Han watching Scrubs and Bear Grylls. Still no food at this point.

Not my strongest point of my stay

Monday night

Monday night wasn't so good. The bloke next to me snored like a fat drunken harpy with nine noses. That as well as the pain in my upper legs (not the operation area) were driving me spare. I was also having hot cold flushes and the annoying things on my feet were tantamount to water torture by the end of the night. A brief session of coughing yielded a lovely green vomitathon - and bless the nurses for trying so hard. Not the most fun I’ve had but I’d still rate it higher than a kick to the bollocks.

Abe-San doing a peace sign for the camera - who would've thought

Tuesday

Tuesday wasn't too bad. Food! Yes! A nurses gave me a rough sponge bath, changed my pajamas and in the late morning my IV and wang tubes were removed – by the nose of Eddie Hitler do you know how far up those things go! It was terrifying – mainly because I couldn’t communicate or receive any reassurance from the nurses! Still had the tube with red blood flowing from my knee to a bottle and confirmed that there was indeed a tube in my spine administering painkiller - which is nice if not a little horrific given that my doctor told me that the primary risk from this operation is spinal infection and should it all go pear shaped there is a high risk of paralysis. Yaaay! Hannah visited again as well as my Kiwi chum Steele and a Texan from work called Brian (one time he used the term “Darlin”). I was still pretty drugged up so couldn't write, forget about reading - even watching tv was a bit shizen. Despite this they took me down stairs to try some rehab and amazingly got a 10-degree flex from my knee - I thought it was premature but evidently not. Going to the toilet was so difficult - It's like trying to clean your ear with a piece of watermelon - everything about it is ridiculous and you get juice and pips everywhere. The toilets are too small for a wheel chair (extremely Japanese).  I also have to cart my spinal and knee ooze cannisters around my neck like some grim Gothic vampiric totem.

View from my window if I max out my bed -
even better in the morning (see below)

Tuesday night

Worst night sleep I've ever had. Sincerely. The snorer now has 1000 noses at twice the volume and my knees were aching deeply. I asked for some earplugs but they can only be purchased from the hospital cafe during the day. *sigh* Mental note - miraculously appear in that cafe and gaff em of every pair. I tried a syringe of itami-dome (painkiller) but to no avail and I eventually settled for a (self administered) suppository (zayaku) at about 5am and the sweet peace was amazing.

Wednesday

Extremely tired again due to the horror show snore/pain-fest, but the removal of my last two tubes was something to look forward too. Pity I had to watch him slowly pull about 15cm of 3 ml tubing out of my knee. But it was good to be free of those two final parasitic annoyances (even if they were there to help me;). I'm right next to the window and so I usually open it up and can look out over a cemetery and temple in the background - autumn is beautiful in Japan as is the cool air. Had rehab again today - got it to about 80 degrees which is so swift. They've also got me the largest pair of crutches I've every seen, evidently the mighty Goliath was sent here for treatment after David’s head-shot. Good healing progress though and to be honest apart from associated muscle pain in the evening, I've had no pain directly from the operation area. I bought some (me me-sen) (earplugs - yesssss) on the way back from the rehab room. Spent a nice night watching some TV shows (Scrubs and Lie to me) as I still didn't have the fortitude to read, let alone write.  Unfortunately all the movies I have brought with me are heavy heavy involved type dramas (e.g. Winters Bone), and I simple couldn’t possibly watch any of them. As soon as it was lights out I "locked in" another suppository, a minzai (sleeping tablet) and pushed those earplugs so far into my ear you'd think I had confused them with the suppository. Oh the pretty colours as I fell asleep.

Wednesday night

Slept like a rock. A rock inside another rock... on the bottom of the ocean… with Dom DeLuise sitting on it. So good.

Thursday

Hannah visited and we listened to the recycling truck collecting cans for 40 minutes. She also brought some more snacks which is nice, the food here isn't too bad but it helps to have some treats on hand (three bags of sour lollies). They put me on a machine that automatically flexes my knee 80 degrees. Some more rehab at 3pm and again was good. My physio Abiru's English is about as good as my Japanese so that makes it tricky but we get by and I'm flexing to 90 degrees now which is terrifying when you've held a ACL injury for over a year and you're two days after surgery.

But yeah as of 3 and a half days of surgery I feel great :D

A big thanks to wonderful wifey Hannah for looking after me.

You!

Something I never in my life thought I would have to do...

So I'm sure you all know of the drama and shenanigans that have been unfolding in Japan over the past six months. We have bore witness to the lot. and although we moved to Japan with a thirst for some adventure - I don't think we ever imagined it to be like this.

Every street corner a mech

Yes, the land of the rising yen has been hit by every stereotype imaginable; from earthquakes to typhoons to nuclear mishaps to giant daikaiju terrorising coastal villages and leveling the land whilst fighting laser discharging mechs.

I know that Japan has a somewhat - and if I may be candid - nuclear history, but I never in my wildest dreams thought whilst living here would need to carry around crudely drawn kanji characters in my wallet so as I can identify irradiated produce. 

I kid you not, there have been many reports of irradiated meat, fruit and vege from affected areas such as Fukushima and Ibaraki that are not safe for consumption.

So I got the kanji, made copies for Han and I and we carry them around with us at all times.

Just the other day I spied some nice cheap green beans in a local grocer, picked them up and checked the kanji to find it was from Fukushima. Further investigation led me to realise that all the cheap fruit and vege in that shop was from one of the two areas. 

I understand the government is attempting to keep the economy of the Tsunami struck areas going - some folk even buy the fruit and vege and then dispose of it just to aid the burgeoning economy. 

This strategy of ignoring issues like this is fairly typical of Japan from what I understand - there is no culture better in the world at ignoring the two trunked elephant in the corner of the room.

So Hannah and I continue to live here safely - but there is an elephant lurking in the corner of our mind and it is hard not to ask it - why are we here amongst the flood of risky stereotypes?

The top Kanji is Fukushima. The other is Ibaraki.

Never leave home without it

Izu Inatori: Day One

Home for a day or so

Well here we are in Izu-Inatori.

Firstly, it’s lovely.

Killin time: We arrived a little ahead of check-in so we went for a little walk around the township. The place is pretty small can’t be any more than a few thousand – not a gaijin in sight. On our little jaunt we spotted a butterfly the size of my hand, a low hanging nest of tiny little swallows and small tank with the most energetic and reactive turtle we have ever seen.

"Got a problem bro?"

The Rza: Ryokan Senoumi, where we are staying is wonderful. The staff are overly attentive and English speakers are a rarity and broken at best, but they try very hard. We had a 15-minute introduction with a woman with no English – there were a few scratched heads to be sure. Our room has a sea view and is very traditional with tatami mats and the set in area with a picture and ikebana that is an old Japanese room feature.  The balcony over looks a fish shaped public pool and just beyond that dug into the rocky shore is a large swimming area. It is also traditional to note that a stay in a ryokan includes breakfast and dinner – although dinner is more of a banquet.

Got a light?

Seafood overload: Prior to coming down to Izu I bemoaned our lack of experimentation in the Japanese snack market. I really wish I hadn’t bought us those god awful fish jerky things as the first meal – nay - banquet contained more experimentation than one could truly imagine. It was a fish banquet and was beautifully and meticulously presented. We enjoyed it but it did feel a tad weird to eat so much fish – we’re just not used to it. I drew the line at the sea snails. They are horrific – I took a nibble and I could not see, taste or understand one redeemable feature of them. The tastes was acrid yet musty, chewy yet crunchy and was completely without pleasure. Will bypass those bad boys next time I’d say.

Old Coach: It was nice to see a bottle of NZ red on the wine list, and when the wine list only contains 5 wins varieties that is all the more impressive and thus Hannah enjoy the explorative feast with a bottle of Old Coach Road Malbec Merlot Cabernet. Very nice indeed and Hannah and I spent the evening playfully dancing around our ryokan room in our Yukata.

Izu or bust(ed) ligament

Hannah almost gets her face eaten
off by a rogue flower

Dancer: We are gassing it down the Izu Penisula coast in a fast train, also known as a Romance Car; apparently its name is “Dancer”. It is nowhere as near as fast as the Bullet train but still thwacks along at a fairly impressive pace. The window is down and my arm is outside the carriage being softly buffeted by a thick warm wind – it is bloody beautiful. So that is our latest little holiday in Japan. We’re headed to Izu-Inatori to a Ryokan Onsen resort called Senoumi for three nights. A somewhat pricey affair at 70,000 yen per person, but it includes hot mineral springs, breakfast, dinner and the train fair there and back so I think it is well worth it.

Good to see you: It is a minter of a day out as I gander out the window to my left and watch the ocean break on the rocks – it is quite nice to the see the ocean again as it has been over six months since I saw it – which isn’t long, but kind of is when your used to living a few minutes from the ocean your whole life. I used to frequently wander down to Oriental Parade back home and it’s those little difference that catch up with you, yielding a wasted sentimentality that felling that can build within you: Longing. Anyway it is good to see the big blue bastard.

Still ballin

Best laid plans of Mr and Mrs Elks: I’ll let you in on a secret- this trip was arranged a mere two days ago. We had made plans months ago to go on a cycling tour of Nagano and Niigata. We were looking forward to it as anyone would. There is a company that organizes private tours and a bloke had tailor-made us a five day tour with cycling, trekking and climbing Mt Naiba, Onsen (hot spring) and Ryokans (Japanese Inns) and it was looking great – until three days ago when he called me and told me the tour needed to be cancelled due to a shoulder injury *gutted*. I was a little disappointed to say the least but these things happen. We went back to the drawing board – a real crap drawing board though as it is Obon week – perhaps the busiest and most expensive week of the year for travel and vacation.  Seriously it is horrible hotels, tours and packages etc double, triple and even quarazzle in price. But after a day or so of faffing we organized this delightful package and we are happy as Larry. By the way, who the smeg is Larry and why is he such a cheery fellow? By the way even though it was cancelled I totally recommend the company that do the bike tours - Kevin the guy organising it did a great job catering for our needs: onelifejapan

Farewell Liggy, I hardly knew ya: To be honest it (the trip cancellation) could all be seen as a gloriously silver lined cloud (Note: I am not a “glass half full” kind of guy – I’m more of a glass moderately full sort of a fellow). We had a work BBQ in the bush on Saturday and they had this giant group skip rope activity “It’ll be lots of fun for sure.” Mmmmm - wasn’t so fun when I tore my Anterior Cruciate ligament clean in half upon landing. No sireee Bob (who is this Bob? And why the formal title?) It is an injury I started over a year ago playing football with about a 90% tear. Bam 100%! Goody. So we’re lucky really as there would be no way on God’s luscious green earth I’d be able to cycle for any length of time – let along walk for more than an hour without it ballooning up. On the moderatle sort of full side of things the swelling has receded and pain is not an issue.

Anyway that is us so far. Will give you an update from Izu-Inatori! S’gonna be great!